Friday, April 15, 2011
April 13 2011
The wind came that night unnoticed it swirled and whirled with a whisper of a breeze Darkness settled. By the night and the wind I was encompassed I was touched and blanketed by the moonlight's release Warmly and firmly by the wind I was held fields were torn, animals scared, forests felled, but I was safe within the windstorm's grasp I traveled so still with my heart and hands clasped Safely across the skies we soared above the moon, the stars, and brilliant sunshine the rain it fell, sparkled and poured the wind became a flame the flames burst into ashes and out came a bird, the first of brilliant colors blue red yellow and green such beautiful colors to be seen! I rode on the back of this magnificent bird anew to ride and renew. I'm on my way to where I'm not sure but wherever I go I hope they have kittens who purr The bird he smiled and said good luck He said goodbye and my heart sunk We will meet again he said begin your journey and when it ends I'll be there to see you through become anew and together renew. I walked the ground where my precious friend left me I walked across the sand knocked on a door, I screamed I'm free perhaps. The doorman asked how I got through the gates... I walked right through them I said, so I wouldn't be late... The doorman laughed and brought me in The lighting there was dim I adjusted my eyes but realized, I still saw the skies why there's the door --I've come inside and yet when I look up I see the setting skies to live in a home where the sun is always peaceful, calm and colored ahhh.. I sighed. they brought me in to chairs of real calf skin I waited there and they brought me purple juice. I read some books, kicked my feet, played with my tongue and made my tooth loose. Finally a man came to me, young lady--- Ms. B, come this way its the way to see. I went inside a red red room empty except for a mirror and a happy tune and a chair and an old fashioned light a shadow crossed the empty chair and behind me came a man in white. The other men wore colorful robes I said--where did I go-- The white man nodded and spoke You're here for now Ms. B, sit down. Its here and now and here you are. You made a wish for life and love to take you far You desire good and compassion you want love, happiness and perfect passion. You must keep taking one road then another All the roads are yours if you wish You can love and dream and anything, accomplish You are the beauty in the sea You are the twinkle in the stars to be You are the warmth in summer rain You are precious and accept the blame You are not perfect you make mistakes but you love and desire and give and take She said thank you very much smiled sweetly having his heart touched Back outside the sun was blinding The air hot saved by the breeze She couldn't feel discomfort or misdirection She was her own with her own protection Onward and on, she'll continue through, mountains, valleys, rivers and clouds through the fog and mist and darkness amidst with heart so full across life she'll go where the rivers of love and ecstasy flow.
i think i already posted this lol hahahahaha
All throughout and in and out there's noise and children all about it hurts my ears it hurts my head my words were nothing to those who heard what I said I'm done, I'm sad, I'm running away I'll come back when its a less dreary day I'm scared, I'm lonely, I'm mad and fed up I'm running to the mountain and going straight up til I get to the top where I'll breathe and stop I'll breathe and sigh, and look around and back up to the sky the beauty will overwhelm my body and soul I'll be rescued by the freedom, out of this black hole My blue dress flutters in the wind, my hair blows freely I smile and close my eyes finally, at peace completely My chest is light my head is clear, no darkness in this world to fear I feel the dirt between my toes, higher than all the world yet still on dirt I stand I accept the wonder of this place, now I must find someone to take my hand My heart is light, my mind is free, I'm going to be and I'm going to be me I set off to wherever I want to spread love, then rest beneath a pretty tree Under the tree there are red ants so I run and run so fast, I pant The ants they bite and so I run, run and run until I can't Now I'm at a little pond so blue and clelar, of it I'm fond I drink some cold clear water, splash my face, continue onward. So now I'm at the bottom of the hill I've gone and seen the world and still I'm up and down and back again writing this story with my blue pen I went up and down to feel and heal I went up and down to see whats real so now I'm here and I understand We're all friends crossing the quicksand We get happy and mad, silly and sad but we must hold on to each others hands or get caught up and sink as we're busy making plans but just go up and just come down and look at everything all around you can smile and you can cry you can live and die you can run away and then come back you can eat dessert first or always wear black but remember that no matter what you need a hand to hold-- no if or but, and a heart to love, and a soul with which to soar above, above the trees, above the land, all the way above the mountains too You'll soar and fly and love and kiss, for always me and you til we are done and all is true, until our hearts are full and our lips are blue then lay down in the grass to rest, once more whispering you are the best
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
The Story of the Dandelion and the Shooting Star
I held the weathered flower
in my hand to disappear with my cold
lips and my lips to form a kiss
With a kiss I whisper a blow of my wish
the petals they sparkle
with the stars the whispers fade as they float
remembered only in remembrance, she wrote
her wishes are as free and as real
as the dreams she writes and sees and feels
they'll float into the darkness and the cold
delicately, patiently until its time to go bold
the wishes they erupt with the vision of
a shooting star
once more a way for one to wish from afar.
4/13
in my hand to disappear with my cold
lips and my lips to form a kiss
With a kiss I whisper a blow of my wish
the petals they sparkle
with the stars the whispers fade as they float
remembered only in remembrance, she wrote
her wishes are as free and as real
as the dreams she writes and sees and feels
they'll float into the darkness and the cold
delicately, patiently until its time to go bold
the wishes they erupt with the vision of
a shooting star
once more a way for one to wish from afar.
4/13
The Theory of Beauty
The girl with a freckled face and a skirt of blue and green swirl.
Once there was a little girl
a freckled face
with a skirt of blue and green swirl.
the butterflies and bugs she'd chase.
One day skipping by the pond
she looked down at her reflection.
she looked through her eyes, the waters and beyond
she knew of goodness and redemption
She ran with a smile spread on her face
and spread the happiness she'd learned
she kissed and loved
and accepted and adored
and never judged.
People watched in awe at her
sweet full heart
her innocence and her peace
her acceptance and her sweet speech
They spoke of her for days tot come
and wondered how kindness came
from one so young
They spoke of how one day she looked into the near pond
and looked into the most beautiful eyes and hair of blonde
she saw the beauty in the little girl--
a freckled face with a skirt of blue and green swirl.
4/13/11
Once there was a little girl
a freckled face
with a skirt of blue and green swirl.
the butterflies and bugs she'd chase.
One day skipping by the pond
she looked down at her reflection.
she looked through her eyes, the waters and beyond
she knew of goodness and redemption
She ran with a smile spread on her face
and spread the happiness she'd learned
she kissed and loved
and accepted and adored
and never judged.
People watched in awe at her
sweet full heart
her innocence and her peace
her acceptance and her sweet speech
They spoke of her for days tot come
and wondered how kindness came
from one so young
They spoke of how one day she looked into the near pond
and looked into the most beautiful eyes and hair of blonde
she saw the beauty in the little girl--
a freckled face with a skirt of blue and green swirl.
4/13/11
4/12/11
Love is in the air
I'm a gypsy traveling to the fair
I can't wait so happy
this poem is sappy
ewwwwwww
anywhooooo
I'm a gypsy with gold rings
I look for pretty golden things
to sell in the fairs
while I sit on broken chairs
yay I'm a gypsy
but I'm sick of being a gypsy
I just want to be a girl
a child.
then I can run and run wild.
I can change my life, my fate
As benjamin button said,
its never too late.
yayy! i can do, say, be, whatever I want!!
I'm a gypsy traveling to the fair
I can't wait so happy
this poem is sappy
ewwwwwww
anywhooooo
I'm a gypsy with gold rings
I look for pretty golden things
to sell in the fairs
while I sit on broken chairs
yay I'm a gypsy
but I'm sick of being a gypsy
I just want to be a girl
a child.
then I can run and run wild.
I can change my life, my fate
As benjamin button said,
its never too late.
yayy! i can do, say, be, whatever I want!!
4/12/11
I look around at everything.
So happy in my new gray-blue t-shirt.
Pink and gray, pink and green painting colors we fling
make marks with rocks, throw some paint, throw dirt
I don't care if the color is mismatched or uneven
its beautiful, I'm believing.
Forget all bad and all transgressions then,
this sad world I'll come above
gonna be leaving
leave my possessions, bring my soul
shed the layers of delusion
look to the future, the beautiful apparition.
this is no mirage its my beautiful vision.
I have a dream.
I lean on a friend and release my troubles
No need to be uptight
Sick of keeping my heart closed.
I'm ready to go and let go.
I'm ready to cross all my roads on my journey.
I look to the beautiful sunset in the distance,
pink and orange brilliantly clashing
the blue and green of the brilliant turbulent sea.
The air is clean I'm ready to cross the river and the sea
I shed myself of layers and forget my grief
and my loss
what I've lost is nothing that can't be found new
or renewed.
The path is clear but still uneven, I must watch my step.
I imagine beauty everywhere, I look to the sky
and see mittens and kittens in the white fluffy clouds.
I am so happy at peace with myself
beyond the whole world of society and democracy
into the world beyond the letter Z---
a world of happiness where I'm set free,
my own world,
my own heaven if I choose,
the rays of light guide me
so pretty and so pink.
i found the ecstasy beyond happiness.
i see the mountains and want to bathe within the waterfalls
forever I am here, I 'm home, I'm alive, I'm in heaven
the answer is everything,
this is it,
the here and now.
its true, its real,
its ecstasy
i feel it---
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE.
So happy in my new gray-blue t-shirt.
Pink and gray, pink and green painting colors we fling
make marks with rocks, throw some paint, throw dirt
I don't care if the color is mismatched or uneven
its beautiful, I'm believing.
Forget all bad and all transgressions then,
this sad world I'll come above
gonna be leaving
leave my possessions, bring my soul
shed the layers of delusion
look to the future, the beautiful apparition.
this is no mirage its my beautiful vision.
I have a dream.
I lean on a friend and release my troubles
No need to be uptight
Sick of keeping my heart closed.
I'm ready to go and let go.
I'm ready to cross all my roads on my journey.
I look to the beautiful sunset in the distance,
pink and orange brilliantly clashing
the blue and green of the brilliant turbulent sea.
The air is clean I'm ready to cross the river and the sea
I shed myself of layers and forget my grief
and my loss
what I've lost is nothing that can't be found new
or renewed.
The path is clear but still uneven, I must watch my step.
I imagine beauty everywhere, I look to the sky
and see mittens and kittens in the white fluffy clouds.
I am so happy at peace with myself
beyond the whole world of society and democracy
into the world beyond the letter Z---
a world of happiness where I'm set free,
my own world,
my own heaven if I choose,
the rays of light guide me
so pretty and so pink.
i found the ecstasy beyond happiness.
i see the mountains and want to bathe within the waterfalls
forever I am here, I 'm home, I'm alive, I'm in heaven
the answer is everything,
this is it,
the here and now.
its true, its real,
its ecstasy
i feel it---
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE.
4/11/11
Life is crazy
life is weird
the horizon is hazy
I'm hanging on to a Jap's beard
This is so intense
Pink
immense
ugly
interesting. deafening.
defining. applying. despising.
All is well and all is good,
lets hang out in the bad neighborhood.
gangsta. thug. This love.
Give me your hug.
The flowers come and go with the season.
the season. the reason.
the season is the reason.
~~~
I hate that poem that I wrote.
I love the cheese that comes from the goat.
I hate the girl in the starbucks store.
She's nice I suppose, but kind've a whore.
I love the girl with amber eyes
and sparkling skin
and dark black hair
into the darkness she'll stare.
I hate the people with lies
its their kind I despise
I love the sun warm on my skin
I hate the pain within.
I love the bright blue sky and cigarettes.
I want to run far away to Mt. Opeechoo. Lets!
Road trip hurray!
We get to drive
We get to smoke
look at the trees and
run from the beehives
before our allergies, us choke.
I love the whistle of the train.
I love the that the things I do are so insane.
I hate the darkness of the souls
hearts left broken, with holes
I love the children playing in the park.
Walking my dog, starstruck in the dark.
I hate the fear of love and closeness
I love the heart and the feelings through
I hate when I get sad and blue
so here's to me, and here's to you,
here's to love, happiness
and the color blue!
~~~
I'm not done writing my feelings aren't through.
This head of mine has a loose screw.
I want to run I want to hide.
I want to find a unicorn and go for a ride.
And smile and scream and run everywhere.
twirling whirling to all the places there.
we'd laugh and smile
and love all the while
then into the clouds to disappear.
and take us to where we are, here.
this is heaven if I choose
or hell, if I've decided to lose.
Every time I fall, I get a bruise
sacrifice, to become the girl on the news.
when will I stop and realize
the beauty of my dream and its demise.
So know your dream
and follow it true
and you'll be you
and you'll be new
and you'll love and love
praise all above.
run from the land of happiness
and into the land of ecstasy
running from the darkness
and to the only emotion to make you free.
I want to break free!
ECSTASY!
Life is crazy
life is weird
the horizon is hazy
I'm hanging on to a Jap's beard
This is so intense
Pink
immense
ugly
interesting. deafening.
defining. applying. despising.
All is well and all is good,
lets hang out in the bad neighborhood.
gangsta. thug. This love.
Give me your hug.
The flowers come and go with the season.
the season. the reason.
the season is the reason.
~~~
I hate that poem that I wrote.
I love the cheese that comes from the goat.
I hate the girl in the starbucks store.
She's nice I suppose, but kind've a whore.
I love the girl with amber eyes
and sparkling skin
and dark black hair
into the darkness she'll stare.
I hate the people with lies
its their kind I despise
I love the sun warm on my skin
I hate the pain within.
I love the bright blue sky and cigarettes.
I want to run far away to Mt. Opeechoo. Lets!
Road trip hurray!
We get to drive
We get to smoke
look at the trees and
run from the beehives
before our allergies, us choke.
I love the whistle of the train.
I love the that the things I do are so insane.
I hate the darkness of the souls
hearts left broken, with holes
I love the children playing in the park.
Walking my dog, starstruck in the dark.
I hate the fear of love and closeness
I love the heart and the feelings through
I hate when I get sad and blue
so here's to me, and here's to you,
here's to love, happiness
and the color blue!
~~~
I'm not done writing my feelings aren't through.
This head of mine has a loose screw.
I want to run I want to hide.
I want to find a unicorn and go for a ride.
And smile and scream and run everywhere.
twirling whirling to all the places there.
we'd laugh and smile
and love all the while
then into the clouds to disappear.
and take us to where we are, here.
this is heaven if I choose
or hell, if I've decided to lose.
Every time I fall, I get a bruise
sacrifice, to become the girl on the news.
when will I stop and realize
the beauty of my dream and its demise.
So know your dream
and follow it true
and you'll be you
and you'll be new
and you'll love and love
praise all above.
run from the land of happiness
and into the land of ecstasy
running from the darkness
and to the only emotion to make you free.
I want to break free!
ECSTASY!
Pancake Mix
We were alive. Now we are dead. We are zombies. We are either in heaven or hell, which ever one you choose. Life is what you make it!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
pretty sure this is the first poem I ever wrote :)
There is the meadow where I run
There is the fleeting song I’ve sung
There is the wind sent from the sea
There is my smile ‘midst, there is me.
No mind can touch no eye can see
What dwells from sea to sea
The sea of thought seen by only me
It is mine for eternity.
It is my secret, my self indulgence,
My hope for evermore,
Man can ruin a home, burn a fence,
Ruin the making of lore
But none can ever stop a thought
Or steal a sentence, crush a dream
It is why we fight, why all have fought
To let knowledge flow the eternal stream.
Batter a body to breathlessness
Deprive it, make it strive to hunger
Then see if it remains thoughtless
It has a soul, it is no matter.
Feed your mind with waves
Found on a learner’s shore
Give your thirst no time to crave
Become knowledge’s entrusting whore.
The bitterness of the heart
Outweighs the sweetened honey part
The bitterness remains
While the honey is drained
It gives me grief and much loss
When you carry your heart like a cross
You’re saddened and shallow
You’re cruel and hollow
Its not your fault you’ve been blinded
Your actions keep me reminded
I thought you’d always care for me
You ignore my silent plea
I love you and looked to you for that lasting love
I thought you were unable to do anything but love
But now I look at you and wonder where is the love
All I want from you or anyone is love, love, love.
Reflections
I am your drug for
evermore,
it's you and me
or out the door
~~~
The girl is sad.
the mirror reflects.
pain to be had.
heart cursed & hexed.
look at the moon.
say goodnight.
soon.
all will be right.
~~~
Your eyes are big.
your mouth is small.
you are not short.
you are not tall.
your mind is smart.
but always forgets.
you're torn apart.
with the regrets.
but don't relent.
love exists as does your soul.
love and love and you'll be whole.
~~~
Reflections of a tattered girl.
all spins around in a swirl.
she's fallen and broken coming down the
hill.
she'll get back up, they'll give her a
pill.
A circular normal mind-numbing
life.
its not even real without the pain,
leave me alone I'd rather take the
strife.
evermore,
it's you and me
or out the door
~~~
The girl is sad.
the mirror reflects.
pain to be had.
heart cursed & hexed.
look at the moon.
say goodnight.
soon.
all will be right.
~~~
Your eyes are big.
your mouth is small.
you are not short.
you are not tall.
your mind is smart.
but always forgets.
you're torn apart.
with the regrets.
but don't relent.
love exists as does your soul.
love and love and you'll be whole.
~~~
Reflections of a tattered girl.
all spins around in a swirl.
she's fallen and broken coming down the
hill.
she'll get back up, they'll give her a
pill.
A circular normal mind-numbing
life.
its not even real without the pain,
leave me alone I'd rather take the
strife.
All throughout and in and out
there's noise and children all about
it hurts my ears, it hurts my head
my words were nothing to those who heard what I said
I'm done, I'm sad, I'm running away
I'll come back when it's a less dreary day
I"m scared, I'm lonely, I"m mad and fed up
I'm running to the mountain and going straight up
till i get to the top where I"ll breathe and stop
I'll breathe and sigh,
look around and back to the sky
the beauty will overwhelm my body and soul
I'll be rescued by the freedom of this black hole
my blue dress flutters in the wind, my hair blows freely
I smile and close my eyes, finally at peace completely
my chest is light my head is clear,
no darkness in this world to fear
I feel the dirt between my toes, higher than all the world, yet still on dirt I stand
I accept the wonder of this place, now I must find someone to hold my hand
my heart is light, my mind is free, I'm going to be and I'm going to be me
I set off to wherever I want to spread love, then rest beneath a pretty tree
under the tree there are red ants so I run and run so fast, I pant
the ants they bite and so I run, run and run until I can't
now I'm at a little pond so blue and clear, of it I'm fond
I drink some cold clear water, splash my face, continue onward
so now I'm at the bottom of the hill
I've gone and seen the world and still
I'm up and down and back again
writing this story with my blue pen
I went up and down to feel and heal
I went up and down to see what's real
so now I'm here and I understand
we're all friends crossing the quicksand
we get happy and mad, silly and sad
but we must hold on to each others hands
or get caught up and sink, while busy making plans
but just go up and just come down
and look at everything all around
you can smile and cry
you can live and die
you can run away and then come back
you can eat dessert first or always wear black
but remember that no matter what
you need a hand to hold-- no if, or but
and a heart to love,
and a soul with which to soar above
above the trees, above the land, all the way above the mountain too
we'll soar and fly and love and kiss, for always, me and you
till we are done and all is true, until our hearts are full and our lips are blue
then lay down in the grass to rest, once more whisper you are the best.
there's noise and children all about
it hurts my ears, it hurts my head
my words were nothing to those who heard what I said
I'm done, I'm sad, I'm running away
I'll come back when it's a less dreary day
I"m scared, I'm lonely, I"m mad and fed up
I'm running to the mountain and going straight up
till i get to the top where I"ll breathe and stop
I'll breathe and sigh,
look around and back to the sky
the beauty will overwhelm my body and soul
I'll be rescued by the freedom of this black hole
my blue dress flutters in the wind, my hair blows freely
I smile and close my eyes, finally at peace completely
my chest is light my head is clear,
no darkness in this world to fear
I feel the dirt between my toes, higher than all the world, yet still on dirt I stand
I accept the wonder of this place, now I must find someone to hold my hand
my heart is light, my mind is free, I'm going to be and I'm going to be me
I set off to wherever I want to spread love, then rest beneath a pretty tree
under the tree there are red ants so I run and run so fast, I pant
the ants they bite and so I run, run and run until I can't
now I'm at a little pond so blue and clear, of it I'm fond
I drink some cold clear water, splash my face, continue onward
so now I'm at the bottom of the hill
I've gone and seen the world and still
I'm up and down and back again
writing this story with my blue pen
I went up and down to feel and heal
I went up and down to see what's real
so now I'm here and I understand
we're all friends crossing the quicksand
we get happy and mad, silly and sad
but we must hold on to each others hands
or get caught up and sink, while busy making plans
but just go up and just come down
and look at everything all around
you can smile and cry
you can live and die
you can run away and then come back
you can eat dessert first or always wear black
but remember that no matter what
you need a hand to hold-- no if, or but
and a heart to love,
and a soul with which to soar above
above the trees, above the land, all the way above the mountain too
we'll soar and fly and love and kiss, for always, me and you
till we are done and all is true, until our hearts are full and our lips are blue
then lay down in the grass to rest, once more whisper you are the best.
A poem by Amber and Betsy :)
Smiling like a mime at the same time
sitting here trying to find more words to rhyme
divine, align with the sunset and my soul
as me and betsy go swimming in the fishbowl
its all clear but still can't find a way out
so we'll stay tickling and swimming about
we'll tickle and swim till its all ok, then begin and begin again
and run into a spring to fling us to the ocean. Still friends.
Friends at the ocean, pictures, sand, sunshine, yay its a party
So we'll party till we fall. Then we'll wake eat toast smoke cigs and eat a blue smarty
now our tongues are blue and thanks to the ocean we are salty and soaked through
soaked through to our salty souls, betsy lets go back to the fishbowl and renew.
No not the fishbowl! We'll get trapped, how will we escape again?
We won't escape, we'll paint the fishbowl blue, put up our
lawn chairs and be friends till the end.
Yay we're friends painting the fishbowl any color any way, nothing matters, it's all crazy!
Crazy like the swim we swam, turned into spam, ran and ran
saw a man, picked a daisy, jumped back into the fishbowl to be lazy, not mazy
We'll take a trip on a camel's back we'll go to India and meet a black
man with a white beard who will give us tatoos of black and blue tic-tac's.
and we will take our tic tacs and tic tac all
around the world looking for boys and girls, to swirl the
world, into one and begin the fun.
It'll be fun like the milky way, swirling around causing mayhem all day.
sitting here trying to find more words to rhyme
divine, align with the sunset and my soul
as me and betsy go swimming in the fishbowl
its all clear but still can't find a way out
so we'll stay tickling and swimming about
we'll tickle and swim till its all ok, then begin and begin again
and run into a spring to fling us to the ocean. Still friends.
Friends at the ocean, pictures, sand, sunshine, yay its a party
So we'll party till we fall. Then we'll wake eat toast smoke cigs and eat a blue smarty
now our tongues are blue and thanks to the ocean we are salty and soaked through
soaked through to our salty souls, betsy lets go back to the fishbowl and renew.
No not the fishbowl! We'll get trapped, how will we escape again?
We won't escape, we'll paint the fishbowl blue, put up our
lawn chairs and be friends till the end.
Yay we're friends painting the fishbowl any color any way, nothing matters, it's all crazy!
Crazy like the swim we swam, turned into spam, ran and ran
saw a man, picked a daisy, jumped back into the fishbowl to be lazy, not mazy
We'll take a trip on a camel's back we'll go to India and meet a black
man with a white beard who will give us tatoos of black and blue tic-tac's.
and we will take our tic tacs and tic tac all
around the world looking for boys and girls, to swirl the
world, into one and begin the fun.
It'll be fun like the milky way, swirling around causing mayhem all day.
Life lost, love gained
he promised wishes
but released pain
wash the dishes
clean the floor
you are mine
you are my whore
give me a kiss, I'll give you a dime
your soul I take, for all time
it was your choice, you relinquished power
give to me, you with gifts, I'll shower
when love can't exist, money buys
love I tell you, is all lies
I can't imagine life without you
you're my rock, my safety too
I sold myself to you and your ways
now I live blankly in a haze
I feel empty robbed of life
my choices have brought unwanted strife
my veins flow evenly without life
my skin is pale, my face is fake
no blood with in my soul I let you take
self-slashing there is no release
my heart, my body will never be at peace.
I lay here, without fear
safely, and with safety, I appear
my smile lifts
my troubles drift
your presence is a distant gift
you let me breathe
and wont no more
please don't leave
this vacant whore
no pressure
no questioning
honesty
imperfections
hold me close
release your peace
finally a positive release
no blood
no drug
no extravagance
just the small
happiness
a chance to laugh.
It's real, its true
because it is the here and now
no longer sad, I don't know how.
he promised wishes
but released pain
wash the dishes
clean the floor
you are mine
you are my whore
give me a kiss, I'll give you a dime
your soul I take, for all time
it was your choice, you relinquished power
give to me, you with gifts, I'll shower
when love can't exist, money buys
love I tell you, is all lies
I can't imagine life without you
you're my rock, my safety too
I sold myself to you and your ways
now I live blankly in a haze
I feel empty robbed of life
my choices have brought unwanted strife
my veins flow evenly without life
my skin is pale, my face is fake
no blood with in my soul I let you take
self-slashing there is no release
my heart, my body will never be at peace.
I lay here, without fear
safely, and with safety, I appear
my smile lifts
my troubles drift
your presence is a distant gift
you let me breathe
and wont no more
please don't leave
this vacant whore
no pressure
no questioning
honesty
imperfections
hold me close
release your peace
finally a positive release
no blood
no drug
no extravagance
just the small
happiness
a chance to laugh.
It's real, its true
because it is the here and now
no longer sad, I don't know how.
I feel so sad and misunderstood
I'd leave this world if I could
I want to run and live unabashed
I don't want this feeling to last
The tears have flowed without hysteria
just softly, continually, barely
my eyes they hurt, my heart it burns
for love, for safety, my soul yearns
I can't explain this world I'm in
I can't describe the pain within
I am who I am, it is what it is
chaotic disdain, or ignorant bliss
To me it's all the same, all pain
I cannot find what I am to gain
not within this hardened heart
in a world where people tear you apart
I'd leave this world if I could
I want to run and live unabashed
I don't want this feeling to last
The tears have flowed without hysteria
just softly, continually, barely
my eyes they hurt, my heart it burns
for love, for safety, my soul yearns
I can't explain this world I'm in
I can't describe the pain within
I am who I am, it is what it is
chaotic disdain, or ignorant bliss
To me it's all the same, all pain
I cannot find what I am to gain
not within this hardened heart
in a world where people tear you apart
It begins and begins again
the hurt the pain the sorrow within
every road every turn every song
takes me away and pulls me along
I don't care where I'm going
happy to breathe and sing along
I know I suppressed too much
let it all out so I can be in touch
The road is bumpy and rough
smoothed by music and love
the little things are enough
I see the beauty in the sky above
Time is crazy and all wrong
it's something we formed to drag along
it pisses me off now and then
but the new day begins again
the hurt the pain the sorrow within
every road every turn every song
takes me away and pulls me along
I don't care where I'm going
happy to breathe and sing along
I know I suppressed too much
let it all out so I can be in touch
The road is bumpy and rough
smoothed by music and love
the little things are enough
I see the beauty in the sky above
Time is crazy and all wrong
it's something we formed to drag along
it pisses me off now and then
but the new day begins again
Liberty I have none.
Trapped within a life undone.
This is life all of it,
this and everything is the meaning of it.
Everything.
The skies, the stars, the stories they tell.
Coincidence no such thing
everything
means something.
The people, the places,
and every instance,
circumstance.
The good and bad don't exist
like time doesn't without measurement.
Trapped within a life undone.
This is life all of it,
this and everything is the meaning of it.
Everything.
The skies, the stars, the stories they tell.
Coincidence no such thing
everything
means something.
The people, the places,
and every instance,
circumstance.
The good and bad don't exist
like time doesn't without measurement.
So much running through my head
I just want to go to bed
too quiet, too cold
I want energy to release
happiness in a high state of peace
I want to jump off the walls
with no cares skipping down the halls
right now no energy, but apathy
I'll snap out of it I know I will
but its real and while it lasts it kills
I just want to go to bed
too quiet, too cold
I want energy to release
happiness in a high state of peace
I want to jump off the walls
with no cares skipping down the halls
right now no energy, but apathy
I'll snap out of it I know I will
but its real and while it lasts it kills
Why do Christians group together
try to reach out and convert one another
I know the meaning of life can only be found on your own
not by some rulebook to make you all clones
I'm wondering and wondering the only way to be
if you ever want to breathe again, be free.
life comes in challenging bouts
channeling fears and doubts
love has so much pain
and so much gain
you must never stop searching
to the the leeches from lurching.
try to reach out and convert one another
I know the meaning of life can only be found on your own
not by some rulebook to make you all clones
I'm wondering and wondering the only way to be
if you ever want to breathe again, be free.
life comes in challenging bouts
channeling fears and doubts
love has so much pain
and so much gain
you must never stop searching
to the the leeches from lurching.
Calming into serenity
just let me be and let me be me
I miss Amber and our untold recognition
we're in a place of self-ambition
no lies all love
its a feeling from above
not god but a galaxy
a place to be safe and loved and free
its all I ask for in this crazy hurtful world
a sense of sanity within my insane being
I want to be loved, I'm already all-seeing
life is what it is, as it is
I cannot change the way things are
they remain despite the way I are
this life is love and admonition
not a collaboration of bad situations
can't wait around for life to hit me
have to bring it on and run into the sea
a fish flopping for air on the sand
not where music sings sweetly
but sweetly singing you are to me
to free me and my thoughts into the sea
to a place I can breathe again
out of this cave, this den.
just let me be and let me be me
I miss Amber and our untold recognition
we're in a place of self-ambition
no lies all love
its a feeling from above
not god but a galaxy
a place to be safe and loved and free
its all I ask for in this crazy hurtful world
a sense of sanity within my insane being
I want to be loved, I'm already all-seeing
life is what it is, as it is
I cannot change the way things are
they remain despite the way I are
this life is love and admonition
not a collaboration of bad situations
can't wait around for life to hit me
have to bring it on and run into the sea
a fish flopping for air on the sand
not where music sings sweetly
but sweetly singing you are to me
to free me and my thoughts into the sea
to a place I can breathe again
out of this cave, this den.
I feel afloat searching for a distant moat
I need the water to surround my soul
set myself, my spirit afloat
I am escaping this black hole
I see the light, the way out
but there is desert round about
no matter, I'll dream of something more
a land without shame or a battered whore.
I see the sun shining and for once I don't cringe
the road to happiness is an extravagant soulful binge
I can't wait for my renewed adventure,
where to go I'm never sure
just follow the road to the rainbow's life
the land without suffering or strife
I need the water to surround my soul
set myself, my spirit afloat
I am escaping this black hole
I see the light, the way out
but there is desert round about
no matter, I'll dream of something more
a land without shame or a battered whore.
I see the sun shining and for once I don't cringe
the road to happiness is an extravagant soulful binge
I can't wait for my renewed adventure,
where to go I'm never sure
just follow the road to the rainbow's life
the land without suffering or strife
I'm getting sleepy, I'm going to sleep sweetly
dreaming of the content, no worries to vent
nothing to bar me from elaborate imagination
a continuation of my happiness celebration
I 'll think of you in fantasy and peace
my fears, my soul are released
of you I'll dream, your smile
the laugh in your eyes, the brown moor along the isle.
dreaming of the content, no worries to vent
nothing to bar me from elaborate imagination
a continuation of my happiness celebration
I 'll think of you in fantasy and peace
my fears, my soul are released
of you I'll dream, your smile
the laugh in your eyes, the brown moor along the isle.
Through the flowers comes the song
a fleeting moment all along
flutters through the leaves and trees
through my soul and across the seas
The rays of sun into my yes
loosens the fear of solemn lies
bringing unmatched happiness
the whites of sky and worries less
Across the green valley I lie
watching the neatness of the sky
on edge in person and in mind
flowing forward leaving mountains behind
a fleeting moment all along
flutters through the leaves and trees
through my soul and across the seas
The rays of sun into my yes
loosens the fear of solemn lies
bringing unmatched happiness
the whites of sky and worries less
Across the green valley I lie
watching the neatness of the sky
on edge in person and in mind
flowing forward leaving mountains behind
Lucid when I hold your hand
elusive in this cold dark land
I feel the distance in your touch
I want you near and I don't need much
Why did you use and excuse that's untrue
whats the real reason you're through
what are your fears, why can't you just say it,
you don't even realize we've got the same shit
We're hurt, we're scared and we don't want love
we just want a friend to speak of
I don't want idle affection
I don't need false protection
elusive in this cold dark land
I feel the distance in your touch
I want you near and I don't need much
Why did you use and excuse that's untrue
whats the real reason you're through
what are your fears, why can't you just say it,
you don't even realize we've got the same shit
We're hurt, we're scared and we don't want love
we just want a friend to speak of
I don't want idle affection
I don't need false protection
lol this one I did title: Everybody's whore
The whore's whirl past as I look with my eye
covered in a patch all I can see is a lie
I lie to hurt, I lie to feel, I lie to think I'm real
It all ends up as a false rendition putting hearts to deposition
Who am I to judge the woman of shame
I'm a whore myself without the fame
I lie and I take whatever I can
I want my body touched by a man
I need the caress and caring hand
he hates me, he hurts me, my heart disbands
I justify and lie, turn the mirror
I am not being used, I am no whore.
covered in a patch all I can see is a lie
I lie to hurt, I lie to feel, I lie to think I'm real
It all ends up as a false rendition putting hearts to deposition
Who am I to judge the woman of shame
I'm a whore myself without the fame
I lie and I take whatever I can
I want my body touched by a man
I need the caress and caring hand
he hates me, he hurts me, my heart disbands
I justify and lie, turn the mirror
I am not being used, I am no whore.
i haven't titled any of my poems... hmmm
Painting my face as I go to bed
trying to ignore the racing thoughts in my head
gazing into my own eyes
telling myself inconsistent lies
I smile, see a glimmer of hope
I forget the noose, the rope
glance again with disgust
seeing weakness I cannot trust
The coin is flipped one side to the next
one face then another--seems hexed
a smile, then a tear
comforted, then fear
I reach out with warmth and compassion
then comes the terror, self-slashing
emotional, physical, an influx of emotion
eternal fluctuation in constant motion
At times I find new pain, then release,
at others I numb myself to find peace
neither really satisfies
its all torture and lies
Run my hands across my body, my skin,
I don't recognize this shell I'm in
I know they say beauty is skin deep
but inside I've lost all there is to keep
Don't recognize me out or in
the voice, the words are lost within
the mirror reflects a stranger
this unrecognizable change illuminates danger
Looking at my body and emotions in contempt
where are the stepping stones I too quickly lept
it all went past in a fog, a blur
I need vision and clarity for the future
Struggling with the embrace of scars
its not my fault its written in the stars
thats not true, I did it all myself
but I want to accept the why and get help
trying to ignore the racing thoughts in my head
gazing into my own eyes
telling myself inconsistent lies
I smile, see a glimmer of hope
I forget the noose, the rope
glance again with disgust
seeing weakness I cannot trust
The coin is flipped one side to the next
one face then another--seems hexed
a smile, then a tear
comforted, then fear
I reach out with warmth and compassion
then comes the terror, self-slashing
emotional, physical, an influx of emotion
eternal fluctuation in constant motion
At times I find new pain, then release,
at others I numb myself to find peace
neither really satisfies
its all torture and lies
Run my hands across my body, my skin,
I don't recognize this shell I'm in
I know they say beauty is skin deep
but inside I've lost all there is to keep
Don't recognize me out or in
the voice, the words are lost within
the mirror reflects a stranger
this unrecognizable change illuminates danger
Looking at my body and emotions in contempt
where are the stepping stones I too quickly lept
it all went past in a fog, a blur
I need vision and clarity for the future
Struggling with the embrace of scars
its not my fault its written in the stars
thats not true, I did it all myself
but I want to accept the why and get help
This is poetry. Hi. :)
Hi. This is my poetry. Old and new. I wish I had dated these but they were all written between December 2010 and through to the current date April 6 2011. From now on everything will be dated since this is a blog yay love, me.
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